In earlier times, one had to come in physical contact with someone to get affected by an epidemic. Thanks to technology, today you only need a virtual connection to get seriously down with the epidemic of loneliness. Various terms have been coined, like FOMO (Fear of Missing Out), to explain the things that come along with it. Now, they have also coined a term called JOMO (Joy of Missing Out), which is supposedly an antidote to FOMO. Yet, many people use JOMO merely as a mask to hide their FOMO.
We all desire deep, meaningful connections in life. When we are unable to establish such connections, we feel lonely. In today’s age, almost 1 in 4 adults experience loneliness on a regular basis. (Source – https://www.mastermindbehavior.com/post/loneliness-statistics, https://mcc.gse.harvard.edu/reports/loneliness-in-america-2024)
As devotees, we are, to an extent, disconnected from the outside world. We may not be aware of the latest happenings, trending songs, movies, or the best restaurants for dinner, and in many ways, we are truly saved! We may not feel FOMO if our colleagues go out for dinner and drinks. In fact, we may be the happiest not being there at all.
But can we, as devotees, feel lonely at times?
Lonely Devotee?
Definitely yes. We are emotional beings. When our emotions are not fulfilled, there’s a great probability that we may feel lonely. Loneliness indicates a lack of deep connection. For a devotee, Krishna connection is the most prized possession. But when we are disconnected from Him, we may feel lonely. We might sense something missing in life. We may feel a want for something.
And to fill that vacuum inside the heart, we may turn to social media – spending time uselessly, either doomscrolling or binge-watching. Or we may be stuck with thoughts that keep us from thinking about the eternal reality. We may feel unnecessarily depressed. Or we may try unsuccessfully to strike up conversations with others on a material platform, only to feel more dissatisfied.
Lonely in a Crowd?
Even if our contact list has 1,500 contacts, even if our Facebook has 1,000+ friends, no one might be there when we actually need them.
What if, at midnight, we are struck with a bout of loneliness?
Home Alone – 1
There is a story in the Srimad Bhagavatam about a prostitute named Pingala. She felt deep loneliness in her heart because she really wanted to enjoy with someone. Standing outside her door, she waited for potential customers—but none approached her. With every passing minute, her loneliness deepened. She stood for a very long time, but no one came. Finally, around midnight, she began contemplating and realized the futility of her desires. By divine grace, she understood that only the Supreme Lord could fulfill her desires and uplift her from her miserable condition.
In her prayers, she lamented that she had been foolishly searching for people who would only bring her pain, anxiety, and depression. In that pursuit, she had forgotten the Supreme Person, seated closest to her own heart, who alone could bestow joy, contentment, and opulence – for eternity.
Krishna is the only person who is available to us at all times, whether it be day, night, midnight, or early morning. He is our dearmost friend and well-wisher.
Alone, with Krishna!
Krishna is never lonely. He is self-satisfied. And He is always with His devotees. If we connect with Krishna, how can we be lonely? The fact that we feel lonely is often a sign of a loose or broken connection with Krishna.
Srila Prabhupada was alone in Vrindavan and also during his early days in America. Yet, he was not lonely. Once, HH Bhakti Charu Maharaja, out of deep affection, told Srila Prabhupada, “I wish I had been there with you when you were alone, struggling in New York.” Srila Prabhupada immediately replied, “I was never alone. Krishna was always there with me.” What a deep sense of belonging!
Home Alone – 2
Sanatana Goswami also lived alone. One night, he had a dream in which a brahmana appeared and gifted him the Srimad Bhagavatam. Upon waking, the same brahmana came to his door and handed him the Bhagavatam. Sanatana was overjoyed. He became completely absorbed in reading it.
He later expressed his deep emotional connection to Srimad Bhagavatam in this beautiful verse:
mad-eka-bandho mat-saṅgin mad-guro man-mahā-dhana
man-nistāraka mad-bhāgya mad-ānanda namo’stu te
O Srimad Bhagavatam, O my only friend, O my companion, O my teacher, O my great wealth, O my deliverer, O my good fortune, O my bliss – I offer respectful obeisances unto you.
Srila Prabhupada, while aboard the Jaladuta, found solace in Caitanya-caritamrita. Though externally alone, he had the presence of Lord Caitanya to make him feel at home.
Resting Our Emotions in Krishna
Whenever we are feeling lonely, we must make a sincere effort to connect with Krishna in any of His forms, either through His Holy Name, His pastimes, or any of the ninefold processes of devotional service.
Our emotions must rest in Krishna. We must feel emotionally dependent on Him. Only Krishna has the capacity to fulfill all our emotional needs. No human being in this world can do that. Krishna can connect simultaneously with a trillion people and satisfy each one of them fully.
Haridas Thakura was deeply emotionally connected to Krishna through the Holy Name. He never felt the need to connect with maya, not even for a moment. Even when Mayadevi personally approached him, he remained content with Krishna.
Only with Krishna, there is love, and there is life. Without Krishna, one is bound to feel alone, even amidst a million people.
Therefore, Yamunacarya says:
bhavantam evānucaran nirantaraḥ
praśānta-niḥśeṣa-manorathāntaraḥ
kadāham aikāntika-nitya-kiṅkaraḥ
praharṣayiṣyāmi sanātha-jīvitam
“By serving You constantly, one is freed from all material desires and is completely pacified. When shall I engage as Your permanent eternal servant and always feel joyful to have such a fitting master?”
